Friday, August 5, 2016

How to bring romance into your day



I’m not a really flossy person, not on the outside anyway.  But on the inside I’m a true romantic.  I love to dream up all the delicious ways I can live a dreamy life, at the same time as being practical and getting things done of course.

The fabulous thing about creating inspiration in my head and letting it flow out from there, is that I am not relying on anyone else to behave in a certain way before I can feel like I have romance in my life.  Instead it’s the opposite: simply by me creating it for myself, I feel good, and that affects those around me in a positive way also.

As an aside, when I talk about romance and feeling romantic, it’s not just about a love affair with the opposite sex, I’m talking about romance in all aspects of my life; perhaps living in a fanciful and fun way is a better way to describe it.  I just know that it feels good.

Synonyms for romance are: enchantment, fascination, amour, flirtation, intrigue, love and passion.  For romantic: adventurous, exotic, visionary, chivalrous, picturesque and extravagant.  Ooh la la, don’t we all need to whip up more of these delicious ideals in case our lives start to feel a little pedestrian?

There are many ways I can bring about the feeling of romance into my every day, and these are just a few of them:

·         Playing Rod Stewart’s American Songbook albums.  Standards always appeal, and Rod’s way of doing them makes me feel so relaxed and like I’m sipping a cool drink in a hotel lobby bar
·         Nostalgia – good feelings come flooding in when I treat myself to a favourite movie from a long time ago (Les Amants du Pont-Neuf which I saw at the movies in the early 90s with a girlfriend comes to mind), indulging in memories of Laura Ashley style in the 80s and spritzing on Estee Lauder’s Beautiful perfume when I’m out browsing
·         Lighting candles, even if it’s daytime, even if it’s summer
·         Reading Victoria magazine, Jane Seymour’s Guide to Romantic Living book (it’s a little dated but has many great ideas) and old-fashioned novels from authors like Grace Livingston Hill (I've only read Crimson Roses so far of hers, and it was lovely, very sweet and chaste)
·         Dressing in flowing garments such as palazzo pants at home in the summer.  I recently bought a new winter nightgown and it’s so soft and lovely to wear, in pale pink stripes (and still fits with my ‘sexy and sophisticated’ nightwear essence words).
·         Cooking a nourishing and nurturing meal for my love and myself
·         Romancing myself with kind words, noting what I’m proud of and congratulating myself on both big and tiny achievements
·         Going for a walk outside – an after dinner stroll is my favourite way to feel romantic if I can con my husband into it (if I’m lucky I can cajole him into an after dinner stroll a few times a year)
·         It may sound strange to say ‘doing something by yourself’, but one of my favourite ways to feel romance is to go to a movie by myself during the day (likely a French subtitled movie since my husband is not a huge fan of subtitles) or going for a window shop and coffee with my journal in a chi chi part of town
·         Buying flowers is an easy one, however since I’m only comme ci comme ça on cut flowers, I either pick them from our (very basic) garden or occasionally buy myself a potted indoor plant or punnet of annuals to plant in a terracotta pot outside

I believe we’re here to celebrate every day, even the ordinary days, especially the ordinary days.  Life really is too short to wait for something special to come along.  Making today special, every day, is how we can most honour the time we are given.

What about you?  What makes you feel romantic?  How do you like to bring romance into your life?

25 comments:

  1. Hi, Fiona. Your blog today made me recall something that I heard in the 80's about planting your own garden and decorating your own life. https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/949697-you-learn-after-a-while-you-learn-the-subtle-difference I didn't recall who said it but it turned out to be Jorge Luis Borges and it is a recipe for being a strong and chic woman who is not dependent
    on others for her happiness or her romantic spirit. I love flowers, old love songs,
    my black velvet housecoat and Victoria magazine for a quiet alone night.

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    1. Thanks for sharing the quote, Madame, it's delightful to read. Your black velvet housecoat sounds very exotic indeed :)

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  2. The romantic spirit is conjured up for me in the French sons of Charles Trenet, watching the musical Gigi (only because I saw this with someone of whom I was very fond, and it brings back those memories), wearing L'Aimant perfume also brings back happy romantic memories of an early holiday with my future husband (I've since graduated to more mature fragrances by Hermes, but L'Aimant was light and girl in 1963!), reading the lovely magazine The English Home (my absolute favourite) ... I don't know Victoria magazine but might I assume that it contains a lot of lace and frills and vintage do-dahs? Or am I totally wrong? Having a warm shower and spritzing perfume at bedtime, and curling up to watch a lovely film - not necessarily the Hollywood version of chick-lit, but something like A Room with a View, Howard's End, 84 Charing Cross Road, or The Enchanted April. But I can't feel romantic in anything other than a beautifully clean and tidy home, decorated with flowers. I don't 'do' house plants, apart from maidenhair ferns on the kitchen windowsill, but I just love an abundance of flowers.
    Margaret P

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    1. I have L'Aimant, Margaret! It is very soft and feminine to wear and reminds me of Chanel No. 5. I love The English Home magazine too, it's quite different to other home magazines (in a good way). Victoria magazine is hard to describe - it's decor, recipes, beauty, style, and there are also evocatively written articles. It's a very romantic magazine :) I ordered 84 Charing Cross Road and have just received it so I look forward to watching it again. I love maidenhair ferns, but cannot keep them alive, alas.

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    2. 84 Charing Cross Road is a delight, but I think only if you adore books, and I think you do. It's a reading list in itself. I think Anne Bancroft and Anthony Hopkins are absolutely great in this film, and I love some of the rooms in the film, too. Take note of one room when Helene Hanff (the American writer) goes to babysit for her friends - it's an apartment with bookcases near the tall windows - I just love it.
      I have managed to keep the ferns alive thus far. I water them every day, they love moisture. They are on a north facing windowsill but whether they will survive the winter remains to be seen!
      Margaret P

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  3. Okay. This is officially my favorite post of this series. I'd totally forgotten Victoria magazine so now I am going to resubscribe to an old friend! A few years back I began the huge chore of zen-ing my house in order to clear out all clutter and my parents' entire household that had to move with us because we hadn't had time to deal with it. Clean, clutter free is romantic, to me. Pretty much everything you said - music like light soft jazz, scented candles, perfume, perfumed lotion, painted toe nails, a dab of makeup - all things both of us love. A glass of iced tea by the pool with oldies playing. All sorts of nice things! I like taking care of myself, but to me, romance is Alpha Hubby - a supremely romantic man when he's of a mind to!!

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    1. Clutter-free and clean is a prerequisite to me feeling good as well, LDB!

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  4. Oh this post is lovely and it brings back so many fond memories of past decades, especially the 1980's when I was a teen to early 20's. I had Jane Seymour's Guide to Romantic Living book too Fiona! I loved how her hair looked for her wedding in that book. She had tiny flowers weaved all over her hair.

    I've always known I am a hopeless romantic, but I had forgotten how far back it went until you reminded me!

    Just yesterday, I bought new decorative pillows in velvet for our bed and living room sofa. Just that little bit changed the rooms so much and gave them more of a luxurious feel - even though I spent less that $9.00 for them. Actually it was quite a splurge for me since it is rare for me to buy anything else (decorative) for the home.

    The easiest and least expensive thing for me to treat my family (or just me) to romance is, like you, to go out to my backyard and cut some greenery and fill a couple vases with them.

    Sometimes I am surprised by how music can elevate my day. In the car yesterday (on my way to buy the aforementioned pillows), my favorite jazz station suddenly played two of my favorite kitschy songs consecutively: C'est Si bon and Girl from Ipanema (the originals). It made me so happy!

    D.

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    1. D, I love those two songs as well, and they really bring about a happy, carefree feeling. Your sofa/bed cushions sound like a great buy!

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  5. PS I forgot to add the most romantic song for me is Charles Trenet singing La Mer! That is truly C'est si bon!
    Margaret P

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  6. This post is so inspiring. I'm so curious about the author you mentioned and will check her out on Amazon.

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    1. I think you might like her books Stephanie, based on the one I have read, anyway :). I heard about the author from Pleasant View Schoolhouse (Anna).

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  7. Hello, I have never commented on your blog before although I have read it for over 2 years now (maybe a bit longer)! In this post you mentioned the author Grace Livingston Hill and I'm not sure I've ever known another person who read her work. I'm just overjoyed. Her books are so endearing. Once I had a collection that included at least 25 of her books which I had searched the nooks and corners of many a resale shop to purchase. Then, I had this crazy idea of letting go of 'stuff' and parted with almost the entire collection. I have regretted it ever since. I managed to find 5 or 6 to put back on my shelves and hope I have the good sense to keep those. I hope you are fortunate enough to find more of her books in the future. I find reading her work uplifting and soothing when I need a break from the hustle bustle of daily living. Thank you for the many ways you inspire.

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    1. Hello Anonymous, and thank you so much for your lovely comment. I, too, have been the victim of my own over-zealous-decluttering at times but not to the extent of your GLH collection. You will treasure your 'new' copies even more now!

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    2. I have never heard of this writer, perhaps she's a New Zealander or American? I will look her up on www.fantasticfiction.co.uk (I did look her up on Amazon and I see she's written many books; perhaps they are lovely but perhaps a little formulaic? I don't mean that in a disparaging way, either. What *writer said - it will come to me later, I've no doubt! - that what her readers want is the same book over and over again!
      *This might've been Angela Thirkell, but I prepare to be corrected by anyone who knows differently.
      Margaret P

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    3. Yes, I think formulaic is a proper description for her writing style. Yes, she was American. The books are quite old now and that is part of the romance of the writings to me. She writes of heroines who are embracing the challenges of changing world, such as riding a bicycle *grins*. Whatever the story, I just enjoy the courage and beauty she describes.

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    4. I agree Anonymous, it's quite comforting to read of a simpler time. The bicycle, so cute!

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  8. I find it's the simple pleasures that bring romance into my life. Savoring a strong cup of coffee in the morning with sitting on my balcony, treating myself to a small inexpensive bouquet of flowers, soft textures such as velvet and silk, a piece of decadent chocolate, a long walk noticing the sights and sounds all around me, being all cozy in my bed at night enjoying a great book. p.s. Victoria magazine is an all around favorite which simply inspires a calm and relaxed feelings. Unfortunately, I am having trouble finding it lately in local stores- sigh..

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    1. Hi Danielle, so true, it's often about the little things. I love your list, especially 'textures', that's really important to me too.

      I've just started a subscription to Victoria because hardly any of our bookstores stock it, plus it's a much better price to subscribe. It's only 7 issues a year and they're slim magazines too, so it's not much of a space commitment. I always consider space when I think about subscribing to a magazine I want to keep. Their website is victoriamag.com

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  9. Fiona, a a longtime GLH fan I'm glad to see the love being shared. If you like Crimson Roses then you might also enjoy The Enchanted Barn, which I just found free on Amazon Kindle. I love her books, though the Christian message is not for me I do love the clothes and the food.

    My other favorite romantic author is Rosamunde Pilcher, who draws her scenes so well and the romance never overshadows the plot. Fans of Jane Seymour's book (I like it too!) may like Barbara Taylor Bradford's Living Romantically Every Day, which is in the same vein.

    Things that make me feel more romantic:
    *burning essential oil in my little oil lamp- lavender last night, and my apartment smelled delicious.
    *cooking a nice meal and sitting down at the table to eat while soft music plays- I have both cooking and eating playlists on iTunes.
    *listening to my morning music playlist on the weekends- it has everything from classical to big band jazz, arranged so that I can slowly wake up as I listen.
    *a cup of herb tea with a good book before bed, curled up on the couch in my pretty sleepwear- I have outgrown the old tee and sweatpants and much prefer my rose-patterned cotton chemise.
    *reading through my binder of romantic articles collected from various sources, including books, some out of print items (a little while ago I went on the Wayback Machine and was able to get old materials from Anne Barone's site) and bloggers I enjoy (including you! I think you gave me the idea, actually.)

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    1. Aurora, thank you, I will try The Enchanted Barn next, I already have it on my Kindle, yay! I'm not a church-goer, however I don't mind the Christian slant in her books. Thank you for the other book recommendations, they sound wonderful :)

      I probably gave you the idea to collect lovely articles in a binder, because I do that a lot, however I've not really used the Wayback Machine. I wondered what you would have found on my blog that isn't still there, because I don't think I've ever deleted any posts. I took a look at 'howtobechic.com' on the Wayback Machine and it was in use by other people it seems, because the older entries are not me! I only registered howtobechic.com last year, and before that (and it still is) my blog was at howtobechic.blogspot.com.

      I, too, have many playlists however I don't have separate cooking and eating lists - I love that idea!

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    2. Fiona, I only looked up Anne's site, I believe. Yours has stayed lovely and complete, where hers has undergone massive changes (to it's detriment, IMO.)

      My cooking playlist is a lot of big band jazz. Mel Torme, Ella Fitzgerald, Count Basie- very upbeat and fun. Eating is slower music- some Frank Sinatra, more Ella, Astrid Gilberto, quieter jazz pieces. I also have one for cocktails, which I don't drink, but it goes well with a glass of pomegranate juice before dinner.

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  10. Fiona, I have really enjoyed your book Thirty Chic Days and have ordered a number of books on "French Living" based on your recommendations! I would love to know if you have published a favorite books/movies/magazines list anywhere. I am new to your blog, so you may have done something like this in the past.
    I have also really enjoyed this article and the comments. I am trying to redefine what romance means. I am kind of a "duty" first personality, so romance, fun, play gets set aside until the work is done. So, I have really enjoyed this article!

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    1. Hello, I'm so glad you enjoyed Thirty Chic Days, that makes me so happy. At the moment all my recommendations are scattered throughout blog posts, but I have started a page that collects them all. It will be up on the sidebar of my blog when I've finished it; I'll get cracking :)

      This blog post was such a pleasurable one to write, and I especially love all the additional ideas in the comments. Just reading them puts me in a dreamy and romantic state of mind.

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Merci for your comment. Wishing you a chic day!