In
the idealistic version of my life I am the type of woman who sits in a coffee
shop, journal in hand, relaxing and contemplating. The real life me never
stops to do that though, and considers it a waste of money to buy a hot drink
that I could easily make at home for ‘free’… Plus I’m usually in a hurry
so can’t spare the time.
I
know, it’s quite pitiful really. It might be a simple enough daydream but
why do I deny myself this small pleasure? It’s not even as though I want
to do it outrageously often like once a week. Once or twice a month would
be fun.
I
was in the city yesterday when I had this thought, so, with more than half an
hour before I wanted to start heading home I dropped into Typo, a fun and
inexpensive stationery store, and chose a notebook and pen. I’d normally
have both these things with me, but I was carrying a tote bag for walking
instead of my handbag, so only had my wallet, phone and headphones.
I
then headed over to Starbucks to order a coffee. A lot of people are
against Starbucks, mainly anti-corporates and coffee connoisseurs, but I have a
soft spot for Starbucks. When I first moved to the big smoke sixteen
years ago I was excited to go there. I felt like I was in the Friends
café, or a movie, or at the very least a big city.
So
I had a lovely half-hour in Starbucks, breaking in my new journal. I
bought a small size to keep in my bag and I've dedicated it solely to blog post
and writing ideas. I wanted a journal to keep close so that it could
capture all my ideas. Yes, I could type them into my phone but I find
it’s quicker to jot down a note and I don’t have to go through my phone to find
them afterwards.
I
always have loads of writing ideas, but they float through my head like clouds
and if I don’t note them down I may never see them again as they float on
by. After half an hour with my journal and coffee, I was ready to go.
It was a perfectly lovely way to spend my time and money.
I
really am too thrifty for my own good sometimes – my ‘decadent’ idea cost me
less than $20. Phew – talk about pushing the boat out Fiona. And I
truthfully did consider before I did this that I could have a cup of tea for
free when I got back, that I probably already had a small notebook that I could
dedicate to writing ideas at home, and I definitely have pens at home. It
was a small comfort zone barrier, but I broke through it! Some people are
spendthrifts, I’m the opposite. I’m so used to saving everything that
it’s quite a turnaround to spend for pleasure.
So
I’m committing to doing more of those things that the lady in my chic dreams
does. That would be a great journal question to ponder actually: How does
she live her life? What kinds of activies does she do? What doesn’t she do?
Now
I’m turning the microphone onto you. I’d also love to know, what does
your ideal chic lifestyle include that you don’t currently do? I mean,
I’m sure she stays at the Ritz Paris, but I mean more the little, inexpensive
things that you could easily do, but don’t. And of course after saying
what it is, you’re going to go out and do it, within a week… and report back
under this post! I dare you!
I’d
also like to ask for your help gathering up lots of blog post ideas: what would
you love me to add to my ideas notes? What struggles do you have?
What do you need help with? What would you love inspiration on?
What would you most love to see as a subject line in an email newsletter from
me?
One of my very favorite things to do is to go to a big bookstore that has a coffee shop, get a coffee and a big stack of magazines, and just pour over them for a couple of hours. I especially like British fashion and design magazines. It only costs me the coffee, and I get to look through SO many magazines that I would never actually buy. I especially love to do this on a rainy day.
ReplyDeleteI loved doing this too, Jennifer, when we had a Borders. Sadly they closed down. It was fun while it lasted though.
DeleteI'm just getting into learning to be more chic so I'll have to ponder the blog idea questions and come back! I consider being more chic as taking time out of the day to sit down with an actual pot of tea (as opposed to a quick Keurig cup) with the whole tea set - creamer, sugar, pot and cup, and a plate with some sort of afternoon goody on it. You would think everyone has at least 15 minutes or so to do that - just stop and have a cuppa - but alas. No. I slog down a cuppa without even realizing I'm doing it. I need to force myself to actually schedule an appointment with myself to stop and plan a 30 minute break with the entire thing - boiling the water, heating the pot, using tea leaves rather than bags - yes, I will do this. You have challenged and inspired me to do so!
ReplyDeleteA proper tea break, how delightful. Using a teapot makes all the difference.2
DeleteI've started meeting friends for breakfast once a month or so - It's a really nice way to start the weekend (we meet on a Saturday morning)It costs only a few quid but feels utterly decadent. I live very close to a Tudor House (now small museum) It has a quiet cafe and you can sit in the old Tudor garden in the summer in utter peace.I also have a French cafe about 1 minutes walk from this so can choose to do something different and have a coffee and croissant here - all the staff are French so it feels a little like being on holiday in France.
ReplyDeleteAll these treats cost only a few quid but the real luxury is taking the time to enjoy them.
Love your Blog - It's inspirational yet so identifiable and......normal (that's a compliment)Regards :-)
Anonymous, thank you, I do take 'normal' as a great compliment. I love that. Your breakfast and coffee/croissant treats sound perfectly wonderful. You're right, too, about time spent being the common denominator in my post and the comments shared so far.
ReplyDeleteFiona, I do the same thing. Save money by denying myself little things, like a coffee while I'm out. But then I'll spend/waste a big amount on one thing that I may use once or twice, or maybe never.
ReplyDeleteThe little thing I'll try to do more of this week, is to use different and prettier hair accessories. Put a little extra effort and creativity into my day-to-day hairstyles.
I love Starbucks coffee, but it irks me no end that a company that's suppose to be so progressive continues to use paper cups! At least in Chicago, you don't even have the option to get a "real" cup, even if you're going to drink your coffee there in the shop. Very short-sighted...
ReplyDeleteBut your post was, as always, lovely and evocative, and a source of pleasure!
hugs,
Janice
Excellent post! Sometimes we just need to do or purchase something extra special. If you have Panera Bread stores, you can request an actual mug instead of throwaway cups.
ReplyDeleteHi Fiona. Could you address how you deal with procrastination? Perhaps you don't suffer from it, but for me it's almost a physical affliction. When I look ahead at a task, project or deadline, the energy just drains away. I feel lightheaded and pale. I've been like this my whole adult life. My favourite "procrastination quote" is by the 18th century French writer, the Marquis de Vauvenargues. He said, "The lazy are always wanting to do something." For me, it's more that I want to have done something. I wanted to go to that concert, take that course or tackle that project. I just couldn't get traction. Can you help me become a "git 'er done" person?
ReplyDeleteI want to start treating myself to lunch at my favorite cafe more often. They have a salad that I absolutely adore and I love going there. I think I may do this today actually!
ReplyDeleteOne of those kinds of things that I need to do more of, is just sitting on my deck or in the sunroom with a cup or glass of tea, enjoying a good book or writing in my journal. I live in a rural area with lots of bird feeders to enjoy but too often I get bogged down with house chores...your post helps me renew my own commitment to witness more of life's beauty and to enjoy myself!
ReplyDeleteMara, glad it's not just me then :) Yay for pretty hair!
ReplyDeleteJanice, I didn't think to ask for a cup, I wonder if they do them in New Zealand. Perhaps if I went more frequently I would. I do like the way a lid on a disposable cup keeps your drink warm though...
Donna, no Panera here I'm afraid, but most cafes use real cups and saucers.
Kerry, of course, what a great idea to ponder for a post. I have a real talent for procrastination too, so I'm sure I'll come up with some good ideas. Love the quote, it's so true, I have loads of plans and sometimes I even do them!
Stephanie, I can relate. With salad, I think 'I can make a salad myself' but when I've had salad out, it's fun to see what they put in it and they're always different and delicious. Plus it's a nice outing and, when it's lunch, you don't look too weird taking a book or a journal and sitting by yourself. In fact I would say it's preferable :)
Anonymous, a weekly bird-feeder date with tea and book/journal sounds simply divine. Think about a time of day that would be the most enjoyable and put it in your schedule/diary!
Buying flowers, even if they are only daisy bouquets from the super market. I will buy a $12.00 jar of almond butter, but pass by the flowers at only $5.00 a bunch. And I love to see them sitting cheerfully on my kitchen island when my husband picks up a bunch. Homes of the wealthy always seem to be bedecked in floral arrangements. A simple grouping of daisies or tulips would be chic enough for me.
ReplyDeleteGreat point, Kristien, flowers are always displayed in beautiful homes and elegant hotels, yet I never buy them for myself. If you take it a step down to the bottom of the chic ladder, I'd easily spend $5 on low-quality chocolate to scoff but not on a bunch of flowers... what's up with that???
ReplyDeleteHi Fiona, I was actually irritated enough one day at a Starbucks that they didn't have real cups that I asked for one. I got it, a real coffee cup and saucer. Everyone around me was surprised and didn't know it was available. If I'm going to have coffee in a coffee shop, I don't want it in a paper cup!
ReplyDeleteHmm, One thing I would like to do is have my hair colored professionally at a salon again like I used to. For the past 15 years or so I've colored my hair myself at home.
Good for you! It's amazing what staff will find if you are pleasant yet tenacious.
ReplyDeleteSo... are you going to book a hair appointment and enjoy every minute of it?
My ideal chic lifestyle would include duck breast as an occasional meal treat instead of not buying it. Sure it's expensive but that's the whole point of a treat. My ideal chic woman would enjoy this treat occasionally with roast or steam vegetable and a fruity sour sauce. OK I will buy, cook and eat duck breast for dinner two weeks from next Wednesday (my birthday).
ReplyDeleteThank you for playing along Rose! I bet your meal will look (and taste) worthy of a restaurant; which is also what I consider when thinking something is 'expensive' - think about the cost of a duck breast main in a restaurant and then look at what it would cost to cook yourself. It won't seem so expensive :) I do this with fillet steak when we have it. Happy birthday to you!
ReplyDeleteI've been trying hard to have two 'proper' tea breaks a day at home...afternoon and evening, both using pretty China 'tea-for-one' sets, which allow me to get 2 cups of tea from the little pot.
ReplyDeleteI've also been trying to make at least a 2-course meal for dinner every night, preferably 3 courses, but it's hard to do that every night, especially when I get involved in hobbies and suddenly realise it's way past dinner time already.
I'm currently back 'home' in England visiting family for 5 weeks, and so my attempts at the above chic habits have been temporarily suspended while I'm here...I'm also on a VERY tight budget of £10 per day, which really doesn't go far in England at all...it will basically buy you one cheap pub main course without a drink, so thank goodness my Mum is feeding me while I'm here :) Spending half of my daily budget on a Cappuccino really isn't a priority, and Mum doesn't have a bath tub in her house, only a shower...so no lovely bubble baths for 5 weeks either lol! I'm focusing more on free pleasures at the moment: museum visits, art gallery visits, sketching and watercolour painting outside in beautiful gardens and parks, drives through country lanes, catching up with old friends and family members and just relaxing :)
^ addition to above: I packed all chic clothes for my annual trip to England this year...then realised that the weather and trekking through muddy parks and fields really required all the clothes I had left at home...thank goodness Mum loaned me a warm fleece and that my boots can be wiped clean 😂😂
ReplyDeleteAnonymous, it sounds like you're making the most of things. There's nothing like a trip home :) I have a tea-for-one set too and I love it.
ReplyDeleteFiona- I am hoping you will write about creating chic outfits. I have spent much time accumulating basic but classic clothes but often wish I looked more Parisian by accessorizing with jewelry, scarves, shoes. I love how French women wear classic clothes in basic colors (black, navy, camel) then add elegance with a beautiful scarf or interesting piece of jewelry. Every video you have posted shows that you pull this off beautifully and I would love to read about some of your tips for doing so!!
ReplyDeleteThis is such a wonderful post! I strive to live in a chic manner and I realize that I actually do, but, still, there are little things I don't do and I can always improve. I appreciate you providing me a moment to ponder what I want and remind myself that I can make it happen.
ReplyDeleteI, too, love to savor a cappuccino in a mug alongside a pastry at a charming coffee shop while reading a book. I hardly ever do this, but should more often. I hope to move to a city where one is a couple of blocks away. Now, I have to borrow a vehicle and drive two towns away for my favorite cafe. Even if a bit inconvenient at the moment, I can certainly make plans.
Another activity I would like to do more often is have a drink out during happy hour every once in awhile instead of having a half or full glass of red wine at home after work. I could certainly ask a friend to go with me, including giving me a ride. I even have a few friends that live nearby!
Ooh, I would also love to have antipasti for lunch every once in awhile. This meal would include a cheese, bread or crackers, prosciutto, bell pepper and other vegetables. I do a small snack version of this with a glass of wine before dinner already, but why not make it a bigger event?
I could also put on a casual dress instead of my usual jeans and tee uniform. I could try to do his once or twice a week now that the weather's fine.
I think I may always be a spender, but right now I must live pretty frugally. I wanted to share something that helps me. I don't think of the $7 I spend on a large cappuccino and pastry as part of my food budget. Instead, I consider that expense part of my entertainment budget. It's pretty cheap for entertainment but rather costly for groceries/meals. Just something to think about.
Love your post Fiona. Thank you. I did a sort of self-development program last year and it really changed the way I chose what to save and spend on. One interesting insight that I learned is that it is totally worth it to spend the extra bit needed to buy beautiful, comfortable, functional and well-fitting lingerie. It makes such a difference in my feeling of self-worth in addition to the functional benefits.
ReplyDeleteA post I would love to see, if you're up for it, is how to shop for chic outfit if you only have a couple of days in London or Paris...say, you're traveling for business and you want to update your wardrobe with some great basics and a few special pieces. Where do you start? Where do you shop? What do you prioritize?
Another post idea: I'm in my mid-30s but most the style blogs I read are written for someone 10-20 years (or more) older than me. What advice would you give to the woman who wants to be age gracefully / beautifully / chic-ly? What advice would you give to your 35 year old self if you could send a message now?
This post really spoke to me. I had colour analysis last weekend, and it has started me looking at my wardrobe in a whole new light, and thinking about who I am and who I want to be, and what the clothes I wear say about that. For me, my ideal is for my clothes to be an expression of who I am, and who I want to be.
ReplyDeleteYour post is a really good reminder for me that I want to be the kind of person who does stop to savour little pleasures like a drink in a cafe with a new notebook and pen bought for the purpose rather than just making do with something from home.
It also reminded me of a programme I worked through a few years ago, where you discover your inner muse. Reading your post, perhaps it might interest you too. http://www.brocantehome.net/blog/muse/
Dana, thank you, what a great post idea. I will definitely do something with it.
ReplyDeleteMichelle, thank you! Even though your favourite cafe is a bit far away, surely there is one closer you can substitute, or maybe make a day of it for your favourite one? I think I've read on your blog you already do that. Also, you could set up a cafe experience at home (again, I think you already do that). I love your happy hour and antipasti ideas. I said to my sister a while back 'it's a shame I don't drink, I walk past those stylish bars and the women sitting outside with their glass of wine look so chic and like they're having a great time'. She said to me 'why can't you do that? you don't need a glass of wine'. And it's true!
Michelle, I love your reframe of treat foods going into the entertainment budget instead of the food budget. Genius.
Busyme, thank you, and I love your post ideas and I'll put them on my list. I agree that good (doesn't have to be that expensive) lingerie is worth buying and looking after.
Mimi, I love colour analysis too, it really opens up your eyes to a new way of looking at your wardrobe. Thank you for the link on your blog, I'll take a look!
Fiona, I love lingerie but it is harder but I feel like a dinosaur as so many women buy merely functional items. I love laces and even still wear slips with my dresses. Would love a post on lingerie-buying and helping women get out of the neutral box. You also wrote once about how your hubby noticed an actress wearing chic pj bottoms and a lace cami. Have you changed your the style of what you wear to bed since then? I love pretty pj sets and nightgowns. Would love to know how you will cope with cooler temperatures soon in terms of nightwear. I second the commenter's post above saying it makes a difference in how she feels about herself.
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ReplyDeleteHi Fiona. I would like you to post pictures on days that you feel chic and put together. Also, if you are eating something chic for lunch, let us see! Thanks, Carla.
I like to listen to Brazilian music from the 60s - Astrud Gilberto, Tom Jobim, Sergio Mendes and Brazil 66. It's not French but I still feel like a chic character in a French film. I usually have it in the background or when I relax with tea, or sparkling water mixed with fresh fruit juice - in a wine glass of course!
ReplyDeleteDonna, own your love of pretty and 'old-fashioned' lingerie! There are plenty of women like you out there, they're just not in the majority - and who wants to be in the majority, not me :) I will post on lingerie and sleepwear soon.
ReplyDeleteCarla, I just posted my breakfast and lunch pictures in 'What I eat in a day'. Thank you for reminding me. I certainly will take photos when I feel pulled together!
Allison, I love brazilian music too as well as other latin types. And naturally would choose a chic glass for your drink :) I asked for an empty champagne flute to pour my sparkling mineral water into at a restaurant on Sunday evening, and to the waitress's credit she didn't even blink... 'of course madame'.
Fiona thank you for this post. Today I treated myself to a Mocha with lashings of whipped cream whilst sitting outside in the sun. I enjoyed watching each step the Barista took to craft it and then really savored it - Marguerite
ReplyDeleteYay Marguerite! Thank you for your chic report :)
ReplyDeletePS. I love your name so much, it's tres elegant.
Sitting with a coffee and a book or journal is one of my favorite things to do. I'll sometimes sit with a coffee and people-watch on the way home from work because there are some cute cafes near my job...but I am also trying to make mundane errands (like dropping off the dry cleaning) a bit more fun by stopping by a cafe before or afterwards. It makes those tasks feels much more chic!
ReplyDeleteAlison, I love to combine an errand with something fun too. Thank you for dropping in!
ReplyDeleteAny time I can eat outside, I feel more chic. Food seems to taste better. Sometimes spending a little more for chocolate or good cheese makes me feel chic. A little goes a long way, so I don't need much.
ReplyDeleteA good scarf, lipstick, and a pair of sunglasses when I'm out always makes me feel pulled together.
Sometimes a luxurious bath or a pedicure (done at home) does the trick too.
I try to ask myself what would bring me pleasure--and that is usually something chic--a matinee to an art film in the afternoon, visiting a gallery or museum, lunch with a friend.
Kandace, eating outside is a great tip, food does taste different! I love all your other chic ideas too :)
ReplyDeleteI'm reporting back that I enjoyed my antipasti lunch today. I just wrote about it on my blog, crediting you for the idea. Merci beaucoup for the inspiration!
ReplyDeleteYay for you Michelle, and thanks so much for your follow up!
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