I listened to a fantastic talk by Marisa Peer this week and
I’m still thinking about it. It has affected
me profoundly! (It’s above, or you can
click through to YouTube to watch it here).
She talks about a commonality amongst all types of people,
from Hollywood superstars to those of us that are living a more normal life,
and it is that we feel we are not enough. That we somehow are failing because we are
not perfect like we think we need to be. She's such a funny and engaging speaker and says that we're not born like this, that no baby thinks 'I'm having a bad hair day' or 'I've got triple knees', no, they just gurgle and smile and accept all the attention they're getting!
I certainly related to a lot of what Marisa was saying, and listening
to her talk really helped me out. You see, I’ve been feeling a bit down over
having gained weight since this time last year.
Comfort eating over our southern hemisphere winter has led me to be a
whole dress size bigger. Sugar is the
main culprit for me and I have been eating much less of it now - not to be
skinnier though, but just to feel good about myself, both physically and
mentally.
Listening to Marisa's talk made me realise I am enough. Even with a bit of extra padding, even if I
feel flawed, I am still enough. Just
saying this to myself when I’m feeling annoyed for giving into the sugar cravings
and because my clothes are tight, I do feel better.
And I’ve discovered the universal truth, which is that you
can’t change something about yourself if you feel bad about it. So hating your weight, for example, doesn’t
mean you’re going to lose it easily.
More than likely you’re going to self-sabotage and eat something
fattening. Telling yourself I am enough, on the other hand, is going
to calm and relax you and help you make better decisions. As lightweight and non-altering as it sounds,
those words really do work some magic.
I also conquered another belief that I had, which was that
if I bought myself some new clothes, it was a waste because I planned to lose
weight and I’d have wasted my money then.
I believed that I should continue to wear the bigger size clothes that I
have had for so long now that they are starting to show their age, until I’m
skinnier. Basically that I don’t deserve
new clothes unless I am a certain size.
I know. It seems so
heartless written down but that’s what I was telling myself. Even in the changing room when I was trying
things on I thought, ‘oh I can just wear my old clothes until I lose some
weight, they’re fine’. And it’s not as
if my weight is going to halve; I’m sure I could still wear the new clothes
even if my weight did go down. And if I
stayed my current weight for the rest of my life? What then?
Never buy anything new, ever?
You will be pleased to know that I bought the new clothes,
in a size that is comfortable, and I’ve felt amazing wearing them. I’ve
looked forward to getting dressed in the morning and am having fun mixing and
matching new and existing (non-threadbare) pieces. And that flows through to how you feel about
yourself don’t you think? That you’re
worth spending money on and looking nice at any size. That you’re enough.
I am enough.
Those three words have been saving my life this week (does
that sound too dramatic?) and I think I’m in love with them. Thank you Marisa, the work you are doing is
fabulous and so needed.
If you are reading this post right now, know that you are enough too. Completely and utterly. Say them to yourself over and over – ‘I am
enough’. You might feel like a dork but
keep on doing it and really feel it. It
will soak in, I promise.
Is there something you’ve been putting off until that
mythical time when you’re the perfect weight or your living situation is
perfect or whatever strict limitations you’ve put on yourself? The first thing that pops into your mind, I
challenge you to do something towards it.
A lovely reader of my Facebook page wrote to me this week
and said she’s started ballet lessons that she’d been wanting to do for years,
simply from being inspired by my Facebook posts on living a chic life. That really made my day! I love it when people tell me things like
that, so thank you Y, for reaching out.
--
A Chic and Simple
Christmas
If you haven’t read my newest Kindle eBook ‘A Chic and
Simple Christmas’ it’s not too late to download it here. If your holiday
season experiences don’t quite match the idyllic vision you have in your mind,
I’d love for you to be inspired by ‘A Chic and
Simple Christmas’ where I share how to create a holiday season you’ll love.
If you don’t have a Kindle eReader you can download the
computer version for free so you can still read all the fabulous eBooks that
are out there. Download the Kindle
eReader free from Amazon here.
And if you have already read ‘A Chic and Simple Christmas’,
I’d love it if you could share a favourite idea or something you’ve done differently
as a result. I'd doubly love it if you could leave me an honest review on Amazon as well. I only have two reviews so far - thank you so much ii and Princess - and would be so happy to have some more to keep them company!
--
Inspiration to
exercise
Many times I have credited the purchase of a tiny (one-inch square!), inexpensive
and easy-to-use iPod Shuffle as the reason why I now happily walk 5-7 days per
week which has resulted in my legs becoming shapelier (even if I’m a bit
bigger, they still look toned) and saved my sanity many times (I might be
grumpy when I get home, go out for a half hour walk and come back feeling so much better).
My iPod also helps me with the housework because I can
potter around happily doing my jobs whilst listening to something interesting.
I get through a lot of audio books and podcasts as you can
imagine, so I was excited to see that Audible is offering two free audiobooks
with a free one-month trial. Yay,
because some of the audiobooks are quite expensive normally!
My favourites are all there as well:
‘It’s All Too Much: An easy plan for living a richer life
with less stuff’ by Peter Walsh (the author narrates which is a bonus; I love his voice and he’s
so motivating to me)
‘The Millionaire Next Door’ and ‘Stop Acting Rich’ by Thomas
J Stanley
And even Allen Carr’s ‘The Easy Way to Control Alcohol’ (I
read his ‘No More Hangovers’ book first but also read ‘The Easy Way to Control
Alcohol which is a longer version of the same thing – they’re both amazing and…
I’m still a happy non-drinker, 3.5 years later).
You can get your two free Audible audiobooks here.
--
Happy week-before-Christmas everyone. Be festively chic!
Thanks for the always wonderful and kind encouragement that you give. Yes, I am enough. I am enough.
ReplyDeleteWe've all been down the road of unnecessary and unwelcome weight gain. Last year's winter, I was in great condition. Then instead of getting fitter and healthier for summer and Christmas (like most people try to do) I did this crazy self sabotage thing where I stopped exercising, started eating rubbish, packed on 7kg.....and could not believe what I'd done to myself!!!
There's not much I could do other than make the best of the situation, and dress as nicely as possible, be grateful that it was 7kg and not 70kg, and get back to eating well and exercising. And I made sure I didn't allow myself to fall into the same trap this year.
Wishing you a Merry Christmas,
Mara.
You did it all a year earlier than me, Mara, so you know how I'm feeling. Similar kgs too, we're practically twins!
ReplyDeleteMerry Christmas to you Zenaide! (gorgeous name too, btw).
ReplyDeleteThat statement really is comforting to say. I'm going to start telling myself that every day. I've bookmarked the video to watch this week as well.
ReplyDeleteI just love reading your blog.....you are such a gifted writer. You manage to inform and inspire at the same time, and there is a comforting tone in your style.
ReplyDeleteBest to you and yours in the New Year!
First time comment from a regular reader.
Happy new year to you Fiona.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your post again it has made me determined to love myself more as I am enough. Like you, I love sweet snacks and over the festive period, I was constantly consuming snacks and food. That has horrified me. I also put on weight in the past year. It is really hard to shred the extra fat in the body as a result of aging. However, my motivation to maintain a reasonable size is to be able to enjoy my old clothes for a longer time. I do buy new ones but they are all classic and hopefully I can still wear them when I am older. I am thrilled to read about your reader Y. It is really good to be able to do something we have wanted to do and did not have the opportunity. I started ballet 6 years ago as an adult and it has become my passion. Even though I will never be a ballerina, it makes me feel stronger both physically and mentally. That is enough. I have written "I am enough." on my bathroom mirror to remind myself whatever I have and don't have or whatever is happening, I am enough.